In the short time that AFL has been up and running, I’ve grown substantially. Initially, the focus seemed to be on myself, and on my quest to become a professional goalkeeper in hopes that I could not only instill motivation and hope into those with chronic disease, but also those who have been told no all their lives. Yet, as I continue on this journey, I realize that it isn’t a journey onwards towards being a professional goalkeeper for the sake of the money, or the idea that I get to play games for a living. No, instead, what I have realized is that what I am chasing is happiness, not just my own happiness, but the happiness of all those who believe their world has gone dark, whether it be disease or loss of hope or faith. It has presented me with times of joy to hear about those I’ve already touched, and frustration sometimes at the back and forth themes that sometimes radiate from my posts. I want to take some time now to sit down, and really explain what has been going on these last few weeks, my belief towards anything AFL associated and probably a few little rambles here and there.
I’ll start with the most obvious of these things, which is all about happiness. The reason I picked goalkeeping, the reason I picked professionally, is two-fold. The first was I wanted to show that it could be done. I truly believe it is possible for me, or anyone, to achieve their highest dreams and this was my way to show it. I still think every day about it, about training, and about accomplishing this dream. But my dream has grown into something bigger at the same time. That dream is a world without chronic illness, or at least, a world where people don’t suffer as badly. This dream for me involves spreading awareness, helping people cope, and leading by example of how to stay happy. Happiness is, after all, the most important thing in life. It has become difficult at times for me, as my two dreams both go hand-in-hand and conflict at the same time, and this proves difficult to juggle at times. There are times I find myself focusing exclusively on one dream while ignoring the other, or writing articles to emphasize one aspect while disregarding the other. It’s important to recognize that everything is interconnected, and it is all interconnected with one thing, happiness.
This theme of happiness is exactly what everything is about. Chasing dreams, doing things for yourself, and not holding back. It’s ironic, happiness is the one thing we need, yet for some reason, it is the hardest thing to achieve. We tend to focus so much on what we don’t have, what’s holding us back, and reasons why we aren’t somewhere further ahead. We focus on past events and we focus on future troubles. And this is the very reason we do not see it at all. Happiness lives in the present, and this is where we need to live. This does not mean you should abandon all responsibility and go spend all your money, but rather, it means enjoying the things in life that you can enjoy in the moment. The fresh air, the food, the company. Any of these things can be enjoyable and when you get the chance, enjoy that moment with the full presence of mind and heart. This is the kind of happiness I am speaking of. It’s all the little small happy things that make up the larger picture. It’s gratitude for the blessings we have as opposed to fretting about what is missing that makes all the difference. This is even more important with chronic illness.
I will be the first to tell you that suffering from a chronic illness can give you a lot to complain about. But it also gives you a lot to think about. It is at these moments that happiness is key. The dark thoughts of disease can cripple you. To work past this you must focus on the nice little perks life has to offer you. All those little things you took for granted before become not so little anymore and you “stop to smell the roses”. Through dealing with my disease, this is what I had to do to turn dark days into brighter ones. This also leads to my second topic which comes in the form as movement as medicine.
I’ve told the story before, so I will not tell it again other than to say that sports played a major factor in recovery and disease management. It has led me to believe that anyone and everyone suffering from disease can benefit from simply moving more, participating in sport, and reap the social benefits of the sporting environment. There is something so natural to sport that takes every ounce of your attention away from your suffering and for the duration of the game/event you are simply the normal person you once were, fighting tooth and nail to come out ahead of your opposition. For me, I took this mentality to my training and I still do. For the hour (or more) that I am on the pitch practicing my goalkeeping or in the weight room lifting to get stronger, I think about my goals. I enjoy winning and improving and that’s where my mind takes me. I no longer have a disease when I’m in this place, but rather I am invincible. It truly makes me feel alive. Of course, the added benefits of the healthy lifestyle that accompanies this sort of attitude is second to none. Regardless of the nature of disease, it is a healthier body that can fight back when undertaking exercise. This aspect of movement as medicine does not require competitiveness. I experience the same effect running, just being out there in the fresh air, and taking in all around me. It also makes me feel alive, it helps battle all physical and mental aspects of my disease. It is exercise and movement that has given my life back.
Yet, there is also one hidden joy in the realm of sport and that is the social aspect. Just about every team I’ve played on became a family to me after long enough. The people I found myself surrounded by were willing to stick their neck out for me, and disease or not, it is always nice to know you have friends like these. Sports brings people together. It is a very important aspect for someone with disease, as disease can make you feel the most alone. For me, this was just another bonus reason to love sports and for sports to bring me out of the darkness of disease.
At the end of the day, I leave trying to spread two messages. The first is that happiness, at least to me, is what life is about. We all make choices, and I choose to live happily, no matter what is thrown my way, even if that happens to be disease. We can’t always help it, but we can work towards happiness, which sometimes requires a strong will, but if you really want it and you listen to your heart, you can attain it. The second message is don’t underestimate the power of sport and exercise. It has brought me back to a normal life, and I know it has helped others. I am optimistic that with the power of movement, we can fight back against chronic illness. It may be a slow battle at first, but it is a battle everyone can fight, and everyone can win. If anyone has any questions about how to get started or where to go from where they are in the realm of sport and exercise, don’t hesitate to contact me. I would be more than happy to help anyone start their journey on the road to battle chronic illness.