It’s been a few weeks. I admit that I haven’t been posting as much as I’d like to, but sometimes that’s just life – especially life with a disease. It doesn’t always work out the way you think it would, and in regards to life lately, it’s been a hell of a lot busier than I anticipated. But really, when is life NOT busy. It really only gets a little less busy or a hell of a lot busier. But either way, enough with the excuses. I will post as much as I can. Let’s get to the real reason of posting, shall we?
A couple weeks ago, my first outdoor season came to a disappointing end as my team, BVB FC, was defeated by a team from the A Division by a single goal. What makes this loss sting even more is that the goal that they got, no matter how well placed a shot, was a shot I had saved multiple times throughout the season. It still kind of haunts me to be honest. I can still see the opposing player setting up his free kick on the right side, just outside the 18-yard box. I see my wall set up exactly as I want them. The player takes the kick, time slows, and I see the projection of the ball, headed for the far left corner. I start heading that way, I dive like I always do, arms outstretched and reaching as far as I can. I bring my hands out to meet the ball, only they don’t meet. In fact, I still do not know what happened. I don’t know if the ball took a weird bounce off the uneven grass, or if I just misjudged the projection of the shot, but the ball bounced off the post and in. It was the goal that lost us the game.
Being a keeper is a weird thing. All the other saves I made don’t matter, because it’s that one mistake, that single lapse in judgement, that cost us the game. I saved a breakway, a bicycle kick shot, a header from a corner (my biggest weakness this season), and more. There was plenty to be proud about, but that one mistake and the subsequent loss makes that entire list of accomplishments meaningless. Such a weird thing, but one of the many things I’ve learned over this first season playing outdoor.
I’m not here to reminisce on my mistakes, or brag about my accomplishments though. For that, I let my gameplay do the talking. Rather, I am here to talk about the overall season, about the impact my disease had on the experience, and about the accomplishment of finishing one full season as a keeper effected by a disease that can limit his/her ability. I truly didn’t think about it until I had time between seasons, but being a keeper with ulcerative colitis is a bit of a hindrance. I mean, think about the time where you have a stomach ache, or you are just getting over the flu. Now, if someone told you to go jump 5 feet into the air, swat a ball out of bounds, and land on your side, you would probably have a few choice words for them on the matter. Yet, for whatever reason, I didn’t even think twice about it. My intestines are riddled with ulcers (sorry for being grotesque) and yet I didn’t once hesitate to dive outstretched, land on my side, and save the ball from going into the net. Strange considering I can’t take a ride in a public bus without experiencing colitis-related anxiety. That is the power of sport though, the power of accomplishment.
This past season was probably the most enjoyable season of sports I’ve ever played. Maybe that had to do with the fact that I had something to prove and a bit of a chip on my shoulder. Maybe if I would’ve had to quit midseason it would change my outlook. But either way, I didn’t quit. In fact, I played every game except for two (one of which was the day after my wedding, the other due to a migraine – not even colitis related). That’s not to say that going was easy. I think every game that I travelled to I had to stop on the way to use a bathroom. That part was a little infuriating, I won’t lie. But really, that is the life I’ve come to know, and that happens no matter where I’m headed. That’s a part of the disease, but to be honest, it was worth it every time. Ya it was a hassle, and a constant reminder of my sickness, but it was also motivation to prove to myself that I can play, and do well in my position despite the disease. You could say I’m stubborn.
The season overall was pretty successful. We were a 50/50 team and most of our wins, I also got a clean sheet for myself. The season even had the pinnacle of a penalty shootout win against one of our biggest rivals to advance to semi-finals. It was amazing. I have no regrets, and honestly hope I get invited out next season for the same team.
That brings me to the start of this upcoming season. The indoor season. Indoor is a completely different animal. It’s faster, more contained, and a lot more shots will be heading my way with more speed. I’m excited and nervous all at the same time. I decided this season to play on two teams. I get to play on one team with one of my best friends, and the other team, slightly intimidatingly, I’m playing for one of my bosses at my job for the local soccer club (in which I will be an assistant goalkeeper coach – but no pressure). I can’t wait. Furthermore, indoor soccer gives me a chance to get some video highlights with everything being so compact. Hopefully I will be able to share some wicked saves with all you guys.
So that being said, stay tuned because a lot of exciting material will be coming your way as the season progresses. I can honestly say that disease didn’t stop me in the outdoor season and it won’t stop me for the indoor season. I’m of the idea that my disease has actually made me a better athlete, and being an athlete has helped me to get over my disease. It’s a very weird relationship that exists between my disease and my association of being an athlete. I’m starting to think they are inseparable at this point.